Having Faith In Yourself

Good morning/midday!

  I wanted to write about something that has been on my mind of late. Something that has been percolating around and has caused me to search out for advice and help for the past few years. 

Though I have been a practicing witch for the past 25 years (26 this summer, wow), and am dedicated to the goddess in general, I have suffered from self doubt because I have not had the opportunity to study with a coven.

  My studies have been solitary and my pagan library is extensive. My charm (what are now called mojo bags) work is very effective in particular. But yet I have had self-doubt. So much so that I reached out to a local coven with an interest in possibly studying to join, though they are more than 30 minutes from my house. 

  When you have two small children, work full time (12 hour days away from the house) with a disabled husband and an elderly mother you take care of, that type of thing ends up being unlikely to happen because I cannot make the consistent commitment the coven deserves. It was hard to break off that attempt.

  But I kept thinking about it. And Morrigan kept whispering, and Freya kept talking to me, and Danu and other gods all telling me the same thing. I always have more to learn, I more than know that, and love to learn more. But, I know more than I realize and need to trust that. 

  My knowledge lies in charm-work, spirituality, energy-work and healing by hands (if I would just trust myself). I have these strengths and these skills that I have used for literally decades. I could write about my experiences with spirits and how my charms have helped solve problems. 

  The fact is, I do not have the money to take classes. I do not have the time or the space in my life for a coven. And I need to realize that I am enough.

I need to stay open to learning
Open to listening.
Open to feeling.
Open to seeking.
Open to finding.
Open to leading.
Open to following.
Open to searching,
For the path lies within.